I was thinking recently about selfish people. I cannot say that I
know anybody who is completely selfish. Nor can I say that I myself am
completely selfish. There are people whom the self-righteous might
label as selfish, for there are plenty of evangelical Christians and
"spiritual" people out there who like to compete to show how unselfish
they supposedly are, and they enjoy sitting in judgment of others. But
even those whom they judge are not necessarily selfish. For that
matter, the people judging are not entirely selfish, either!
Everyone
I know cares about at least somebody. A friend. A Mom. A Dad. A
husband. A wife. A son. A daughter. A dog. A cat. Maybe there are
people out there who have been so bruised by life that they don't care
for anyone. But I try not to sit in judgment of them. Rather, I pity
them because they are so lonely. And, when I say that I pity them, I'm
not saying that from a condescending standpoint of moral superiority.
It's not easy for everyone to make friends. And it's sad when people
have been so abused and beaten down that they neither care for someone
else nor feel that others care for them. What can they do? Perhaps
therapy or a relationship with God can launch them onto a path to
healing, so that they can love themselves or feel loved by God.
One
biblical passage that disturbs me is Matthew 5:46 (and I'll be using
the King James Version): "For if ye love them which love you, what
reward have ye? do not even the publicans the same?" I recognize and
appreciate that Jesus is trying to encourage people to love their
enemies, to go above and beyond what many people do. Jesus is telling
people that loving their enemies will bring them a reward, which can
motivate them to keep on trying to love their enemies, especially when
the going gets tough.
But my problem with the passage is this: I
think that it's commendable when people love those who love them.
Shouldn't affection for another human being, or even a pet, be something
that we should celebrate, rather than dismissing it by saying "That's
not special, for everyone loves those who love them"? Can't affection
for another human being----even if it's reciprocal----serve as a
foundation for a love that is disinterested? Should I beat myself up
because I love those who love me, on some level? Do I need to find
difficult people and be nice to them before I can finally feel good
about myself?
I think that the Bible is all for gratitude, and so
I'd say that it's commendable when we love those who love us, even if
love for enemies may deserve a greater reward. Moreover, another point
to make is that it can be a challenge at times for us even to love those
who do love us----family and friends. I believe that, anytime one
meets that challenge, one should pat himself or herself on the back.
Why not celebrate love, both when it is interested and also when it is disinterested?