Faith Amidst Insecurity

One reason religion exists is that there is so much insecurity in the world. A line that I used to hear is that, as long as there will be math tests, then there will be school prayer. In my case, having to take comps increases my prayer life. There's a lot of worry as I prepare for them, but even the activity of taking them is like going through a mine-field. Things can be going smoothly, and then, BAM, out of the blue, while taking the comp, I run into a particular subject-area in which I'm not confident.

I seriously wondered if God would bless me on these test, when I've been questioning Christianity a lot over the past few years. But that's just been me being honest. I've also wondered if God would answer my prayer to pass the tests---primarily so my loved ones and I won't have to pay the huge fee next semester that registering for comps entails. I wonder this after reading Ecclesiastes, which seems to say that God just lets things go: God doesn't always intervene to set things right in the lives of people. I don't even need to read Ecclesiastes to feel this way, for I can observe it when I look at the world!

But I can pray. And I try to find comfort in the idea that God loves me, regardless of how I do on my comps.

Not that I've heard any news about the first one. These are just my reflections.