I watched Desperate Housewives last night, after I finished writing my paper, of course. What a tornado! There were both uplifting and tragic aspects of the episode, and Mary Alice (the narrator) remarked that the catastrophe changed not only the suburban landscape, but the people as well. But there was one specific incident on yesterday's show that got me thinking about hatred and love.
As those who watch the show know, there's been a lot of tension between Gabrielle and Edie over Carlos, whom both women love (according to the world's definition of love). I'm not going to go into all of the story's details, since that will only convince my readers that I watch trash, but what happened was that Gabrielle and Edie were fighting as the tornado was about to strike. When Edie saw the tornado, she told Gabrielle that she could use her (Edie's) crawlspace.
In the crawlspace, Gabrielle said that she regretted that things turned out the way they did. Edie told her not to do any last minute confessionals, since they would survive and Gabrielle would be able to hate her for years to come. Gabrielle then asked Edie if she really hated her. Edie paused and responded, "No, I don't hate you, but I just wanted Carlos so badly. I didn't want to believe what I knew to be true--that he's really in love with you."
Here's the lesson that I get out of this: I don't have to like everyone on the face of the earth, but I can value all people as human beings. There are a variety of reasons that we don't like certain people, and often they are rooted in our own frustrated wants or needs, but we should always remember that everyone has the right to live. All people deserve the chance to learn and to grow, even if they choose to remain jerks. Edie made a decision to value Gabrielle as a human being, despite their bad history. Gabrielle understood that she had certain wants, but she expressed regret that life is often imperfect and can turn out badly for other people. And Edie articulated the reason for her anger and learned not to hate Gabrielle the person.
There are times when I get the impression from evangelical Christians that God wants me to be friends with all people. I find such a goal unrealistic. I can't make myself like someone whom I do not like. But I can realize that even those I dislike are humans like I am, with thoughts, feelings, needs, and experiences. If they exist, then they must have value and a purpose, since God doesn't make anyone in vain. The Old Testament required Israelites to recognize the value of others by not killing them or by helping them when they needed help. Hopefully, such commands would help them see others as human beings, whether they particularly liked them or not.